The Spanking Lady

Today I was the Spanking Lady Again. When my kids were little they would tell the other kids my nickname was the Spanking Lady. I did spank when they willfully disobeyed or they needed immediate discipline. But they made it out like they were beaten, to scare the other kids. These kids knew me though and weren't scared. Every once in a while it kinda made me feel mean to have that nickname. Since my husband is gone often with his job as a pilot (usually 2 weeks at a time) all discipline fall's to me. When I started homeschooling, I also had to add the discipline a teacher gives his/her students. I'm constantly telling, motivating, pushing my 3 kids about doing or not doing something. Lot's of times they don't like me, or the things I'm telling them to do or not do. But, that's my job. Sometimes, when I see how much they dislike what I'm telling them (one had a tear trickling down a cheek today, and one was just managing to hold them back) I want to just give up, I'm tired of being the Spanking Lady, the one who is always the bad guy. Who needs to know the difference between mitosis, and meiosis anyway, or how to find the area of a triangle (just build rectangular rooms!)? But I can't. Even though they may not need the information they are learning ever again in life, they need to learn how to learn information. They are sick of me telling them to change their attitude about things, but a lot of times in life all we have the ability to change about our circumstances is our attitude. And all those chores I force them to do? Well, I want their house to be clean when I come visit them when they get older. Maybe then, when they have kids of their own they will look back and say, "Yeah my mom was the Spanking Lady, but she loved us"